Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
Randomize
