But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
