Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
Randomize
