I am apparently in rockville maryland. I just threw up my tater tots I had fro brunch in a safeway parking lot. Then ordered a pizza. Pepperoni and pineapple. I'm sitting in the parking lot, next to my barf, waiting for my pizza. WOOF. Someone just gave me an oxycontin tab. Can u come get me? I'm scared
The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize
