A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Randomize
