Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
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