A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
Randomize
