I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Randomize
