I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
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