There is no way he is gay with that hair.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
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