The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Randomize
