You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I'm passing your future prison.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Randomize
