i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
