i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Only a mothe r could love this liver
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize