I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Randomize
