FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
Randomize
