Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Randomize
