Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
I'm just crazy horny about you
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Randomize
