my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
Randomize
