Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Randomize
