Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
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