Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
he told me I talked like a deaf person
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize
