I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
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