Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
as a side note pls kill me
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
