i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
Randomize
