dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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