I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
Randomize
