Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
