Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
Randomize
