so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
Randomize
