I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
her facebook's as public as her vagina
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Randomize
