They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
Randomize
