with your own penis?
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
