oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
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