We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
