i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
