So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize
