I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
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