I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
