my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
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