: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
Randomize