i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Randomize
