We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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