Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
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