I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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