Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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