Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
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