I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
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