how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Randomize
