spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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