I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
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